Today I’m going to be teaching you guys how to make your boobies look very nice. 10 ways to get bigger breasts (boobs). I’ve written a blog post on how to make your butt look bigger, so if you guys want to see that, then you can click here.
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#1 Get a breast massage
I know this sounds super, super weird, but online it says it increases blood circulation, pulls more phytoestrogens into the bloodstream which makes them grow.
#2 Birth control
I know obviously all of us can’t do this, but birth control does make your ta-tas grow. One of the side effects of birth control is larger breasts. So talk to your doctor about this. Don’t just go to your doctor and be like, “I want bigger boobs. Let me go on birth control.” Obviously, there’s a ton of stuff that has to go with that. But that’s just one of the things.
Herbs have been scientifically proven to make your breasts look bigger. The Egyptians used to do this for natural breast growth.
Apparently, you can exercise your way to bigger breasts. You have to work on your pectoral muscle, toning up these muscles, which are underneath, to make them look a little bit more perky and appear larger than normal. Push-ups are really good for this. All of them are effective.
#5 Push-up bras
The holy grail of all boob masters. Kylie Jenner uses this trick. This is the trick that changes lives and boobs. Are you ready for this? Push-up bras. You heard it here, folks. Victoria’s Secret has the best ones, and I think the one that Kylie Jenner says that she uses is the Bombshell Bra. I’m pretty sure this Bombshell Bra is going to be really expensive, but you know, boobs are an investment, you know?
#6 Wear more clothing with a detailed neckline
This is something that everyone can easily do. Wear more clothing with a detailed neckline. Obviously, this one just does nothing for me because I’m hoping that I show a lot of boobs, but actually I’m not wearing a bra, and I’m wearing a shirt that’s pretty high up. If you want to see my boobs you have to stalk me on Instagram. Jokes on you.
Yeah, clothes with a more detailed neckline, that’ll really emphasize your little chesticle area.
#7 Clothes with my vertical lines or stripes
Clothes with my vertical lines or stripes, like this chick. Clothes that… Okay.
Keep in mind, fitted clothing. This is another bonus tip. Really important. Obviously, mine’s really baggy and you can’t really see, but more fitted garments, your lines will go like this. It’ll really accentuate your curves.
#8 Boob makeup
This is my favorite. It is boob makeup. Boob contouring. It is so fun. I have done it before and it’s so cool. You just, you have to use it the right way, okay? If you guys want a video on it I will totally, totally do it because I think it’s so much fun. I can contour my collarbone, my boobs, my ass, my arms. I could contour my whole body. I could contour my feet if I wanted to. Contouring is just an amazing thing. I love makeup. Here’s me just getting possessed. I love makeup.
#9 Wear black
This is a cool technique that a lot of celebrities use. It’s wear black because what black does is it absorbs all of the light on your body and that makes the person that’s looking at you focus more on your cleavage. And that’s why so many celebrities wear black. It’s also very slimming, and you know, I feel like a boss-ass (beep) when I’m wearing black, you know?
#10 Body posture
Improve your body posture. Obviously, if you’re hunching back going, “Hello, my name is Adelaine, nice to meet you,” your (beep) isn’t going to look as good as they could. So chest up, elbows back, and strut your way to the grocery store. I don’t know. Where are you going?
I think my bonus tip would be to not wear a bra so much. I think I read somewhere that wearing a bra to sleep… All right, I found something. It says wearing a bra does more harm than good. It does nothing to reduce back pain and weakens the muscles that hold up the breast resulting in more breast sagging.
There you have it. Don’t wear a bra. Push-up bras. Obviously, boobs are a huge confidence thing for girls. Some girls, they want their boobs to be smaller. Some girls, they want their boobs to be bigger. Nobody’s happy with their boobs. I’m here to say that I love your boobs. Not in a creepy way, but I appreciate them, and I think that they look awesome. And don’t change your boobs for a guy. You know, if a guy only likes you because of your boobs, girl, I don’t think it’s going to last.
I want you guys to leave this post confident and knowing that you’re awesome, and your boobs are awesome, and your butt is awesome, and you look awesome, and your personality is awesome, and nobody in this world is like you. And I hope that you guys really do enjoy this post and it helps you feel confident and get what you want.
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I think my tip of the day would be to love yourself, because someone is happy with less than what you have, and you know, maybe someone wants your boobs. I mean, not in a sexual way, but they want your size. I don’t know. Why did I… Get the nice boobs. Your lung protector. Your Humpty dumplings. Your Whoopee cushion. Humpback whales. Your frost detectors. Your Scooby snacks. This is getting so inappropriate so quick.